Saved from Terror

So I called my grandma today just to chat.  My grandmother is very much as close as a mother to me, both of my grandmothers are, actually.  They each consider me more their youngest child than their oldest grandchild.

Anyway, talking to Gma, and she is a woman who doesn't care for scary films.  She gets really horrible nightmares very easily, so she generally avoids anything scary.

So we're talking, and she begins to tell me about a movie that just came on that she was watching...

"It's not a recent film, it's got Jack Nicholson in it, and he's got a young son, and they are at this ski lodge type place and it's winter and it seems to be tense..."

"Grandma, change the channel immediately!"

I rescued Gma from The Shining.

Dear Hugh Jackman -

Please realize you are gay. God love you, you are fantastic, a good actor, singer, dancer, all around bad ass when needed - but you are very, very gay. It upsets me you have not realized this. Would your family not approve? Society? Hollywood? You know what I say to all of that, Hugh Jackman? I say you gotta do what makes you happy. Everything else will fall into place.



Going to argue with me? Hugh, let's look at the facts. This is your wife.

Do you know how hot you are?

Do you know how successful you are?

Do you have a drinking problem?

And then there are the children that you and your wife/mom adopted...Oh wow, I'm sorry to hear about the reproductive issues you had as a couple. Wait, what? You didn't use your fame to talk about that, humanize a touchy subject? Oh, maybe that wasn't why. I know, I know...adopting for the humanitarian route! They are probably from some under priviledged country... Wait, what? They aren't? Normal Austrailian adopted kids?

Wow, Hugh. Wow.

Are you worried at what they'll think?

You know what? I think they'll understand. You seem a cool dad - and you are rich as hell, so you now, that cushions the blow.

So in closing, we all know.

love and kisses - j

The Baby Bug

So I'm finding that about 80% of my drive for children is based on then having someone to watch children's movies with.

Last week I watched Labyrinth twice.

In the same day.

In a row.

Why am I confessing that? I don't know, I'm pretty sure I should feel a sense of shame with, but I don't. My issue rises from my urge to talk about these movies with others, only to be met with, 'You shouldn't confess this, you should have a some sense of shame from watching that.' But instead, I shake me head thinking they are the oddball in this conversation.

I just look forward to having a good follow up discussion with my three year old upon finishing Follow That Bird.

History Lesson

When the US entered WWII, a peace keeping party was sent to Iceland to request use of their airport as the US needed a non-sinkable place to refuel prior to the European mainland. They had a poster board which they set up, titled 'The US's Need for Iceland's Airport'.

Iceland refused, as they were attempting to remain neutral.

Someone literally flipped the poster board presentation around, to reveal the other side titled, 'The US's Plans to Seize Control of Iceland'.

Iceland reconsidered, and the US was allowed to use the Icelandic airport. Iceland's only stipulation was that no 'negros' were stationed on the island.

FUN WITH HISTORY AND RACISM!

Dear Peanut Butter -

Don't worry. Just like I told tomatoes before you, and spinach before that, it's going to take a lot more than a little e. coli to keep us apart.

love and kisses - j

Just Don't Make Him Angry

Clint Eastwood is terrifying. I mean, no matter how big his 'heart of gold' is, it really only takes one wrong move for him to kill your whole town.

Calendar Kufuffle

I needed a 2009 calendar, so a few weeks ago I went to Borders and picked one up, as I had a gift card. It was slim pickings, as it was the end of January already, but I did manage to find a pin up girl one, which is a favorite of mine. And it was 50% off! Promotions all around!

I got home and hung it next to our cork board to find that it is set up with a Sunday weekending. I don't know why, but the first block of each week is the Monday of that week. The dates are all correct, but everything is off in my head.

So, at a glance, I am now unable to figure out the date. I have to stare and think about it.

But I'm not taking down my pin up girlies.